We’re looking at Paul’s letter to the Colossians. He now starts a new section. He’s giving some final exhortations before concluding.

In the past, Paul has written about family issues in detail. Now, he’s simply reminding them of his teaching. Paul makes a statement about each member of the family.

Wives, submit to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord.

Colossians 3:18 NIV

He is saying to wives that they need to make a choice to view themselves as under their husband in rank. This is not something the husband can force. It’s a matter of the heart.

This doesn’t imply that the wife is inferior to the husband. It’s also not a matter of blind obedience. It’s about what’s fitting – proper – in the Lord.

Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.

Colossians 3:19 NIV

To husbands, he says that they must make a choice to actively, positively participate in the lives of their wives. In this way, the husband is not striving to please himself, but doing the best for his wife’s sake.

You’re not to be harsh. You’re not ordering them as their lord. The wife is not a slave to the husband. You’re in this together to make the best family environment.

Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

Colossians 3:20 NIV

When it comes to the children, we get to the word, obey. Just a note; this is NOT the same word as submit, above. The children’s place is a place of obedience.

All throughout Scripture it’s clear that children are to obey their parents. I would even say that if you’re a single adult living with your parents, then you still need to follow the “house rules”.

Fathers, do not embitter your children, or they will become discouraged.

Colossians 3:21 NIV

I believe this is more about dealing with older children. As they mature, they begin to question certain things. That’s when we must learn to communicate.

They may ask, “Why?”

“Because I’m the father and I said so.” is not an appropriate answer. As I parent, I need to show some respect for them as a thinking person.

The word, discouraged in this verse, literally means to be without passion. There are too many people in this generation who have grown up passionless. They spend their lives trying to self medicate with entertainment, social media, alcohol, or any of a thousand other things that can fill their time.

This is why the home is a sacred place. For believers, it should be a small picture of the church of Jesus Christ.

Christ is the head of the home and each of the members are striving to fulfill the corporate calling. Yes, every home has a calling. Every member of the family has a part to play.

That’s why how we treat one another is so important. Selfishness by any one member can bring the whole structure down. That’s why so many homes are in turmoil.

As believers, our goal should be a home where Christ is portrayed in all of His glory. It should be an example to the world of how life should be.

Question: How well do you fulfill your spiritual role in your family?

© 2024 Nick Zaccardi